What do you think?
Recently I've come across some toxic exchanges between groups within our fellowship opposing each others' views in public forums (electronic media, newsletters, etc.) These exchanges name names and spend more space defaming each other than they do addressing the teachings they disagree on. How do we guard against treating our brothers and sisters this way? How do we disagree with each other, as will happen from time to time, and follow Paul's instruction in 1 Thessalonians 5 to encourage one another? Share scriptures you turn to for instruction and encouragement in this area of our Christian walk.
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I've been thinking about this a bit lately. I think social media allows us this level of transparency we have never had before. It's easy to forget the "golden rule" (Matthew 7:12) and say things during online interractions we might not normally say when speaking face-to-face. I also think, as sisters, we need to hold each other accountable in this area and follow Matthew 18:15, going to a person privately when need be. Of course, we need to be striving to glorify God in every thought, word, action, and deed, 1 Corinthians 10:31, and remembering that He sees all, even what we do on Facebook.
ReplyDelete-Missy
One thing that I've always tried to do in discussions, online or otherwise, is to remember that to disagree with someone does not mean that they are making a personal attack on you nor do they deserve to be attacked BY you. It is important to remain objective and try to remain open-minded and respectful of others' ideas even if they are different from your own. You can disagree without making personal attacks or being judgmental. "Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven" (Luke 6:37).
ReplyDeleteIn the end, you may still disagree on a subject, but by refusing to make personal attacks that do not really address the issue, you can continue to show love to the one you are disagreeing with.
Thank you for posting this, I know sometimes I myself find it easy to make a "Zing" at someone in an online post because you are not thinking. I have posted something to go back and read it and realize I should not have said that and removed it, but who knows how much damage was done while it was there. You never know how many people saw it, also what is typed can be taken the wrong way as you can't hear the tone of voice. You may be able to tell in a conversation that something is a friendly joke, but you don't know that in the written word. I know that I will try to be more careful in what I say and do.
ReplyDeleteDarby,
ReplyDeleteThank you so much first for creating this blog. And second thank you also for including me. Even though I have moved away to KY I am still your sister and will always be no matter where I go; so thank you.
I agree with Missy wholeheartedly we need to be the new creation Christ has made us to be no matter where we are and what we are doing. We need to be the same person whether we be in church fellowshipping or at home on facebook. We need to die completely to our old self. Coll 3:8-10 8But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. 9Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices 10and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator.
I especially love in 10 where it says "being renewed in knowledge." Love that! If we are in the word daily are we renewed in knowledge daily? Yes! I would say. So even if we have made mistakes in the past we can make a conscience effort to change that right here and now. Isn't God's grace wonderful? Oh yeah I hear some heads nodding. LOL
We had a wonderful sermon this Sunday one of the men was filling in for our regular preacher and he talked about using our time for Christ and how we are called to go and spread the gospel and he backed everything with scripture and really drove home the message that we have way to much idle time, & pleasure time and not enough working toward adding to the Kingdom time. I enjoyed it a lot and got a lot out of it.
Love you all,
Mary
What a great outreach! Thank you for doing this. Lynn
ReplyDeleteI think society as a whole has become much more abrasive and less polite. If we are not careful, these traits can subtly creep into our speech and attitudes. Before we even realize it, our attitudes and words begin to be less Christ-like. Col. 3:12-17 gives us the perfect guidelines for dealing with others. We are to be clothed with "compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience". We are to "put on love" and "let the peace of God rule in (our) hearts". v17 "and whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus". If we remember these things, then the way we handle conflict or disagreements can be an opportunity for us to honor God and to be a testimony to Him. The world should be able to read or hear our exchanges and KNOW that we are set apart. Prov. 16:21 "and sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness."
ReplyDeleteNow THAT is wisdom :)
Something I am trying to do and teach my children to do is follow Micah 6:8: "He has shown you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with your God." I try to remember this before I say anything out loud or written. Does what I say show me acting justly toward those in my audience, loving mercy to those around me and do those that are listening to me see that I am walking humbly with my God? When I think on these things before I speek, I find there are many words that might have been said that would be hurtful or meaningless. I hope to always be able to do this but know there are times I will not think before I speak. In those times I am thankful to those that show mercy towards me.
ReplyDeleteScriptures warn and instruct us about how on one hand a harsh word stirs up anger and on the other a gentle answer turns away wrath. (Proverbs 15:1) I Tim. 6:20-21 and 2 Tim. 2:14-18 tell us to avoid worldly, empty chatter, opposing arguments and wrangling about words which is useless & leads to the ruin of the hearers. We are to handle accurately the word of truth and to be ready to give a defense with gentleness & reverence for the hope that is in us. (I Peter 3:14-17) There are many verses about how our speech is to be seasoned with grace and to only use words that are good for edification that it may give grace to those who hear. (Eph. 4:29-32 and Col. 4:6) Like you mentioned about I Thess. 5; which instructs us on how to build up one another, encourage one another and to always seek after that which is good for one another. As well as being urged to admonish the unruly. Slandering one another just brings destruction and those who "hear" will be driven away from ever wanting to follow Christ. Who would want to be part of this, if this is how people treat one another? Food for thought.
ReplyDeleteThanks Darby for starting this for us!
In Christian Love,
Melanie
Thank you ladies, for your comments! This is just the type of exchange I was hoping to generate. Also, remember, if you have a question, no question is dumb, silly or unimportant. This is to be a multi-way exchange and questions are an important part of it!
ReplyDeleteNow, something in Melanie's post caught my eye...she mentioned admonishing the unruly. I find that many Christians do not take kindly to being admonished and will try to shame the admonisher by calling them judgmental. Not that I spend a lot of time admonishing beyond the instruction I give in classes I teach, but when I have needed to speak to someone about their behavior and sin, it sometimes has been a very unpleasant experience. I suppose that helps me be very careful about what I say and how I say it, so God has a use for it!
Admonition is clearly supposed to be a part of the Christian experience...Romans 15:14, 1 Thessalonians 5:12 and 2 Thessalonians 3:15. The word 'admonish' in the New Testament tends to mean to give instruction. My question is a very practical one...what is the best way to admonish a brother or sister who is pursuing a sinful path? Have you found things that help to get through to the one you are speaking to that you love them and that is why you are even bringing it up?
Can't wait to read your comments and questions!
Darby
Well, I believe admonition is part of a relationship as a whole we are supposed to have as sisters, which includes edification, encouraging, uplifing, teaching, and loving one another. I think admonition goes hand in hand with that relationship, it can't be a one-shot deal. The human tendency IS to go on the defense when others point out something we are doing that is wrong, even when deep down, we know the other person is correct in their concern. It's important that it's done in complete humility, love, and with the knowledge that we are all sinners. I absolutely believe admonition is an important part of our walk with Christ and completely seperate from judging. When Jesus told us to judge not, I believe he was referring to hypocrisy, not about exercising discernment. Don't be the pot calling the kettle black sort of thing.
ReplyDelete-Missy
Missy, Thanks for your post! I always forget how Jesus used the word judging and find myself stammering for a comment when I get accused of it. Hopefully, now I will remember it as referring to hypocrisy.
ReplyDeleteThank you for that Missy. I agree and too often I have seen sin go on because out of "love" sisters wanted to stay out of each others business. I think their is a fine line there. We of course must respect each others privacy, however if we do love one another as we are commanded to and we see one we love walking in sin we NEED to get in their business and not be afraid of being told that we are judging or "not welcome" to voice the scriptures view on this. (Notice I said the scriptures view and not our opinion.) We so need to also keep a watch on that. Our opinion matters not!
ReplyDeleteYesterday I heard this and thought it was cute and worth sharing:
"I am lead by Gods GPS - God's Plan of Salvation."
Have a blessed week all!!
Mary S